Karen Toews
Scripting Vibrant Living Beyond An Empty Nest
If you want to change, write a new story
Would you describe your life as one with purpose, energy and joy? Or do you feel stuck in your story: missing the fulfillment of desires you were designed to experience.
We all have some downer days. But maybe your story line isn’t working for you.
- was it written by someone else, i.e. your parents, an employer, a teacher
- crafted by life’s circumstances, i.e. where you were born, social conditions
- scripted from beliefs based on a mindset where things can’t change
- a story you wrote, that was working – but the script needs revising
The quotes for “Change your life, change your story” are myriad. This one’s interesting.
If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.
Mo Willems, children’s author, Goldilocks and the Three Dinosaurs
I’m not suggesting that everything is messed up with your story or that one should simply run and escape from life. But I encourage making changes if that will make your life more vibrant, authentic, and meaningful in the stage of life you’re living now.
Let’s look at some areas where one can get stuck and some thoughts for change:
- trying to fulfil expectations of others:
- already feeling stressed about the upcoming Holiday season? It’s your call: do you need to provide decorating, food, gifts to meet everyone else’s wishes?
- have you lost joy in your position as youth leader or secretary of the women’s group? Make choices based on your right reason and right motive*
- comparison with others, or yourself – how you used to be
- moving and staying fit is great! If it’s time to switch from running a half marathon to cycling, yoga or Tabata at the pool – that’s okay. Your personal challenge to walk 10K every day for a month may inspire or intimidate others – regardless, it’s your story.
- a friend’s gardens may be flourishing and beautiful: if that kind of work doesn’t bring you joy anymore, just appreciating their’s can be enough.
- you choose how to spend your money. i.e. new hiking boots or sofa, or cruise tickets or membership for a lecture series – live life fully in your own skin
- spiritual and emotional health
- there are several paths to draw near to God; in Sacred Pathways (referral link), author Gary Thomas shares ways to free you in your path of worship. Being open, listening in your spirit can be inspiration for your new story.
- Don’t hide – staying connected matters.
- neglected nutrition and health
- if alcohol has become more of a daily necessity than a glass of wine with dinner do the hard stuff – get support to help you.
- a friend may have lost – and gained – weight several times but that was their story. Supporting health is your privilege and responsibility – don’t go it alone!
- being aware of personality type
- we’re all wired differently, discover what makes you tick, where your strengths and weaknesses lie. It can help you to work with who are as a person and how you live with others in your world. There are many personality tools: I like and use the Enneagram. Explore it a bit with Ian Morgan Cron’s Typology podcast and the book he authored with Suzanne Stabile The Road Back to You (referral link).
- Eduardo Garcia*, burn survivor and positive-living hero says it so well, “stay in your own lane of truth“. Be YOU .
How many stories do you know of that are ‘pretty good’, but could be happier and healthier with some changes. How about yours – are you ready to start writing?
Love and gratitude for being here. If you want, please do share your new story!
Karen
P.S. Whatever stage of life you’re in – my desire is that you will be rejuvenated with healthy food, physical movement, living with purpose and joy. If you want to connect with me for a free short chat to help make this happen for you I’m available here or at ketoews@gmail.com.
P.P.S. This is my Affiliate and Privacy Policy.
Cabbage in the Sauerkraut Crock
On my previous website I posted often about food, including recipes. I still love experimenting with, researching, cooking (and eating!), healthy food but I’ve rescripted my nutrition writing and focus to a broader nourishment story for body, soul and spirit.
However, considering the seasonal abundance of cabbage, its health benefits when fermented, and the fact you’ll feel like such an amazing (rural or urban) ‘homesteader’ producing this easy-to-make sauerkraut I just needed to share this recipe with you!
First some not-so-trivial tidbits about cabbage (and cruciferous veggies).
- good defense against, and the possible prevention of, cancer. Over-dosing on one food group (even vegetables) is not a cancer-free guarantee. But according to Sally Errey in Staying Alive! Cookbook for Cancer Free Living, scientists weren’t sure why this vegetable family had this distinction until recent studies which have shown their ability to help the body’s toxic waste-disposal system. Certain plant chemicals, like sulforaphane and indole-3-carbinol, trigger the release of a protein that causes the release of several toxin-fighting enzymes that may either neutralize cancer-causing chemicals or help the body excrete them.
- contains Phytochemicals (plantchemicals): good source of antioxidants which have unique abilities to modify human hormones and to prevent toxic compounds from binding to human DNA – possibly preventing damage that could lead to cancer.
Benefits of fermentation.
- preserves food/nutrients
- breaks nutrients down into more easily digestible forms
- creates new nutrients
- removes toxins from food
I learned the ways of a gardener from the example of my mother – an extraordinary worker who preserved the fruits of her labour by canning, freezing, pickling – but never fermenting. Perhaps it wasn’t in her Scottish upbringing or she’d heard stories of smelly brine bubbling out of crocks lurking in dark cellars! Whatever the reason, the only sauerkraut I ate growing up was bought at the grocery store and that pattern remained.
Until my nutrition studies piqued my interest in making my own. I bought Wild Fermentation by Sandor Ellix Katz (referral link) because I read “sauerkraut is easy to make” on more than one page.
And it really is so. I’m not the expert but I encourage you to try it.
What you need.
Food: Cabbage and salt (I use coarse sea salt). Utensils: A sturdy knife, a crock, a tea towel, a plate that is slightly smaller than the opening of the crock, a large rock.
Buy good solid heads of cabbage. I’ve learned from shopping at our garden markets that “fall” cabbage is the best type to use for sauerkraut. I don’t know the proper name of this particular cabbage, but living in Lunenburg county that boasts both home-style and commercial sauerkraut operations, I do what the experts advise.
Except not always on this point: sauerkraut should be made as the moon is waxing. My hankering to fill the kraut crock doesn’t always line up with the lunar cycle so sometimes I do my own thing. But this year I’m following the Farmer’s Almanac.
Steps to Make Sauerkraut:
Chop cabbage into threads, as fine or coarse as you like it.
Place in a large bowl as you chop it. Sprinkle salt on it as you go. How much salt? This depends on health and taste preferences. I recommend going lightly – for starters, 3-4 Tablespoons of coarse salt per 5 pounds of sliced cabbage.
Mix cabbage and salt thoroughly and pack into your crock. It’s important to pack just a bit at a time into the crock – pressing it down hard with your fist or some other sturdy tool. This is an important step: you don’t want to allow room for air pockets and the tamping packs the kraut, helping to force the water out of the cabbage.
Cover the cabbage with a plate and place a heavy stone (that’s been well-washed) on top of it. This weight is needed to force the water out of the cabbage and to keep it submerged. Very important: push down on the weight as needed to help that happen.
Cover the crock with a tea towel and set in a corner of the kitchen, out of the sun and in a cool rather than warm location.
Check the kraut the next day and every day or two after. The important factor is that the water-brine always covers the cabbage. According to Sandor Ellix Katz, “some cabbage, particularly if it’s old, simply contains less water.” He suggests if the brine hasn’t risen to the top by the next day, you can add some salt water (1 Tbsp. salt to 1 cup water) to bring up the brine level. I haven’t had experience with this as the brine has been sufficient. To help it stay submerged in brine, every day or so I firmly press on the rock/plate.
Here I’ve taken the rock out so you can see the brine. This was after about 4 days.
When is it ready?
It’s all about how you like it. It should start to be tangy in about a week.
Taste it. Its flavours will evolve as it ages. If you do take some out to enjoy, repack the remaining kraut, keeping the surface level and your weights clean. I generally leave mine in the kitchen area for a couple weeks, checking it often. Then I’ll move it to a cooler location for 1-2 weeks before putting it into jars and into the refrigerator. I’ll taste as I go but don’t usually eat mine until it’s fermented about 4 weeks. My batches are usually small like the one above so it’s all eaten before it gets too ‘ripe’.
Maintain cleanliness, keep cabbage submerged, let me know how you like it!
Love and gratitude for joining me here,
Karen
P.S. Whatever stage of life you’re in – I encourage you to be rejuvenated with healthy food, physical movement, living with purpose and joy. If you want to connect with me for a free short chat how I can help you work to make this happen for you please get in touch here or at ketoews@gmail.com. My wish is for your ‘Vibrant Inspired Living’ xo
(Affiliate Disclosure: I am a participate in affiliate marketing, including the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Whenever you buy something on Amazon from a link you click on my blog, I get a (very) small percentage of that sale.)
Thoughts about Aging: Re-scripting Life Might Include Dementia
This summer I had my 65th birthday.
In my heart and mind I tell myself I’m somewhere around 50 years old; blessed with health; physical fitness; freedom in time and resources as compared to the earlier years of raising children and being employed; in love with my husband of 45 years; and have not been tested for nor diagnosed with dementia.
Thank you God, for all of the above.
However, there are times I: forget what I went to fetch when I go into another room; need to repeat a phone number several times to help (and hope) it sticks; can promptly forget your name a minute after I’m introduced to you.
Does this bother me? Uh, yes it does: enough for a part of me to keep “watching for dementia signs” but not enough to practice memorizing my shopping list – I think I’m forever stuck in my habit of using recycled envelopes for that.
The book Still Alice (referral link for novel written in 2007) and the movie that followed revealed the story how ruthless dementia is: affecting some earlier than later – irregardless of intelligence and keen cognition – bringing with it fear and loneliness with the sense of losing oneself as life weaves in and out of blurry stages.
Through observing a neighbour’s early-onset diagnosis and rapid decline, and supporting a friend with her children and their father, dementia’s Russian roulette capacity to show up ‘at will’ and steal life and personality has come ‘closer to home’.
But the reality is: we will all age.
We’re advised to do Sudoku puzzles and to eat the ‘healthy 10-food MIND list‘ which can be good practices for every age. Worry is a bigger struggle for some than others – but it’s probably safe to say everyone at some time has thought ‘will dementia will part of the aging process for me or someone in my close circles’?
For me I receive help and courage in facing this fear of ‘what might be or could be’ by:
- my belief in a power higher than myself; a trust in God’s love for me, and a faith He helps me feel safe as I walk every path of my life.
- reading stories of other people’s journeys to enlighten my understanding. And here I highly recommend the most recent book I’ve read, a memoir Somebody I Used to Know (by Wendy Mitchell, referral link for Kindle book). Mitchell writes her firsthand experience of Alzheimer’s with optimism, sharing her coping systems – all the while knowing ” it wasn’t always like this. I know there was another me.”
- having compassion for others and myself in the questions and unknowns
Mitchell’s book is illuminating and brimming with courage: a helpful guide for people concerned and connected to all sides of the dementia diagnosis. I hope you will read it for yourself: here are just three highlights.
Following her diagnosis and “there’s nothing we can do, I’m afraid,’ Mitchell writes:
I can still remember the feelings of loss and fear and hopelessness…in the days and weeks that followed, all I could of was that word afraid. It felt so negative, so scary. They were afraid there was nothing….I was afraid there was nothing….if I’d been told yes the diagnosis is dementia….[but] I’ll put you in touch with people who can help you to adapt, who also have a diagnosis…to share tips and tricks…Immediately I would have had hope.
If you’re told by your boss day after day you’re stupid, you eventually feel that way.
A diagnosis [of dementia] is bad enough….devastating news – but that’s where negative language can stop…positive language can begin. If someone tells you day after day that you’re suffering from dementia, you end up believing it. We ‘struggle’ on a daily basis to outmaneuver the challenges we face but, often with help, we can find ways of overcoming those struggles…..[people should] replace the word sufferer with living with.
Wendy, a single Mom with two daughters who by necessity or personality was always extremely organized, uses Post-it Notes and technology to help remind her of routines. Another tool she uses to help outwit this disease was by creating a memory room as soon as she had her diagnosis.
Dementia isn’t an inspirational topic. But considering we don’t all have the privilege of the ‘long view of life’, it’s my hope that your take-away from reading this will be one of hope and some tips you hadn’t thought of before to help yourself or someone you love.
Love and gratitude for being here,
Karen
P.S. Whatever stage of life you’re in – I encourage you to be rejuvenated with healthy food, physical movement, living with purpose and joy. If you want to connect with me for a free short chat how I can help you work to help make this happen for you I’m available here or at ketoews@gmail.com.
Connection and Friendship: Part two What are you hungry for
Recently my husband and I enjoyed supper with friends at their charming reno-in-progress, 200-year-old summer-house. The planked salmon served with veggies-extraordinaire – finished off with fresh fruit and whipped cream for dessert – was ‘deliciously’ satisfying!
However, the meaningful and heart-rich conversation we shared around their table was what truly invigorated our spirits; we went home satiated in friendship and connection.
Our experience – in this case, choosing to linger and talk around the table rather than moving to another place in the house – underlined how meeting and eating at the table can be so deeply nourishing, even sacred: healthy for our hearts and our souls.
Not everyone is skilled in cooking; having people over for a meal is very stressful for some. Maybe this is you.
And depending on your personality, not knowing your guests very well before they come to your house can cause some apprehension.
So how can we make this work – for gathering others to meet and eat at our table?
Your guests may also feel a bit nervous- take small steps. Sometimes it helps to ask several people you think who would relate to each other, and you provide the setting for them to share and get to know each other. This can be for a group of women only, or for couples or any other group. True story: because my husband and I are more on the out-going side we’ve been asked to join in on a meal at my cousin’s house to help keep the conversation rolling. Really. That works. My husband and I have been married a long time and in this area of inviting people to our house we have learned to trust each other’s intuition, which has resulted in meeting some very interesting and wonderful people: as recently as two weeks ago when we offered hospitality to a motorcyclist my husband met at a car wash!
It’s impossible to measure but I’m sure these kinds of steps have added more blessing to our lives than for those we’ve been able to share with. Connection goes both ways.
Ask people about their stories – they generally have at least one they’re happy to share.
Through my Mom’s capable example I watched and learned her ease with hospitality – which included my help peeling potatoes, setting the table – and washing dishes! So for me the kitchen, preparing food – is mostly a happy and comfortable zone.
But in the past that ‘ease’ has often put me into an entertaining mode rather than one of hospitality. So I’m paying attention and learning to integrate my passion for cooking good food, with my desire to invite connection and friendship by:
- not planning my menu and foods simply to impress the people I’ve invited, as that can often be intimidating or disconnecting.
- providing an environment that is focused on comfortable rather than fancy or needing to be expensive or feeling excessive
- being less complicated doesn’t mean less tasty. Clear and simple.
- inviting guests to join in the food preparation to promote connection – you’re in!
- being aware that everyone can’t eat everything. Asking ahead about allergies and food sensitivities (even foods people just don’t like) helps put everyone at ease.
- discerning when it’s appropriate to include Pinterest ideas for fun and pizzazz!
It can be amazing: I encourage you to open your heart and home, share around your table to meet a hunger for connection and friendship through providing:
- food: God’s greatest gift to us for physically nourishing us, his creation
- our ‘homely’ expression of breaking bread and drinking wine – being sensitive, willing and caring to share your heart and compassion
- opportunity for memories, relationships, conversations and intimacy that will become part of who we are and our history, to understand how-
“The world is far more delicious than it need be.” Tom Chester
Thank you for connecting with me; I appreciate your online friendship and hope if connecting with others is a challenge for you, that you will have courage to Begin.
With love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about rejuvenating your life with healthy food, getting more active, moving towards purposeful living at any age, I’m available here or send me an email at ketoews@gmail.com.
Thirty Thoughts for Scripting Life with Confidence and Hope
Every day is full of decisions – we don’t even realize we are making some of them, as they are choices we naturally default to. An example: I have a breakfast ‘script’ that works well for me. I always have coffee not long after I wake up (not in bed, thank you very much!) so there’s no decision on that, and five days out of seven the rest of my breakfast will be a combo of oats, nuts and seeds (my favourite is home-made granola), with fruit and yogurt.
You may allow for more of a surprise factor in your morning food routine, but sometime throughout the day there is probably some track you automatically follow, i.e for exercise, shopping destination, connecting with someone, etc.
Like me and my breakfast, the daily track you’re on may be working well for you. But what about the other points in life where you aren’t happy anymore following the script:
- that you inherited by virtue of where and when you were born?
- that is based on old choices and ingrained habits and patterns?
The script isn’t bad, we all need one to get started. But often, as part of our growth, we need to write a new script for our lives.
This is what my work and vision for Rescripting Life Beyond an Empty Nest is all about.
There are so many new script possibilities; and probabilities like these that may have prompted you to consider a re-write:
- navigating a career change
- living in a new location
- becoming a Grandmother (oh such a wonderful gift!)
- figuring out and living with purpose as you age
- giving yourself permission for adventures you’ve reserved for others (younger or older than you!)
- shifting expectations you’ve placed on others, yourself or granted others for you
It’s not easy to change. But I’ve seen it happen and believe in the possibility for women to re-script what isn’t working for them: now, in whatever stage and space of life:
- you are stronger than you think
- you don’t need to be afraid of your strengths
- becoming the woman you were designed to be is a valuable gift to yourself and to your world around you – and an expression of gratitude for LIFE
My son Brad, one of the most meaningful lines in the script in my life, is a podcaster. When I read his recent episode, Whose Line is it Anyway? I was so excited to hear how he addresses this very thing – how to move away from following the script to improvising our way to a more vibrant life.
Re-scripting isn’t tearing up the old story; rather it’s an improvisation, some rewriting of those parts that don’t fit us anymore.
Improvising in music, improvising in life, is not the absence of a script, the absence of an established order of ideas, thoughts, or musical notes. Rather it’s an individualization of the script. We make the choice to repeat, play, and act what we believe is worth keeping, introducing new notes, new meaning, and new experience. Brad: Whose Line is it anyway?
I am offering FREE on my Vibrant Inspired Living FB group Thirty Thoughts for Scripting Life with Confidence and Hope. In the month of August I will be posting thirty thoughts to help you script your life with confidence and hope, with the desire you will improvise your way to a more vibrant life. (If you aren’t already a member of the Vibrant Inspired Living FB group, just send me a request – no pressure to stay longer than you wish.)
For extra inspiration I encourage you to listen to Brad’s podcast (can download from website or find it on B-RAD with Brad Toews in any podcast directory or app). This podcast is a quick 20 minutes – while you’re driving or cooking – with useful ideas and interesting musical metaphors to inspire the mindset and actions necessary to make those changes in your life.
Thanks for stopping by – and I do look forward to seeing you this month on the Thirty Thoughts for Scripting Life with Confidence and Hope on Vibrant Inspired Living!
With love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about rejuvenating your life with healthy food, getting more active, moving towards purposeful living at any age, I’m available here or send me an email at ketoews@gmail.com.
Photo credits: Cheryl – with kudos to her novice rock-climbing sister at the top!
What are you hungry for? Part One
I’m a recipe reader and collector, foodie aficionado, nutrition guru and coach for emotional eaters so I spend a LOT of time thinking, sourcing and writing about food, nutrients, presentation, flavour, allergies and sensitivities, food trends, etc.
However, in this post, triggered by a podcast interview with Jen Hatmaker and Shauna Nieguist , I’m removing all my ‘foodie’ hats and want to take a close-up look at what are you, the people at your table and mine, hungry for?
Honestly, this subject is a bit of a minefield for me:
- because I highly value nutrition and healthy whole real food as the best way to honour our body and health – a gift to be appreciated and cared for.
- I also believe that sharing hospitality and love and food around our table expresses kindness and serves a basic need for connection and acceptance.
- I am so influenced by my background experience and passion about food and hospitality, that I can make the whole scene quite complicated and intense.
What’s the answer to the question? We all crave nourishment physically and for our soul. If there’s a tug in our heart to serve these up for others (for us too!), the challenge is finding what way fits with who we are, in the stage or place we are in right now.
Finding a way to make it work.
- move towards simple. Give yourself a break, make it more comfortable for everyone. A ready-bagged salad and BBQ chicken from the supermarket might not be organic but it is okay! Be real. Start with small steps if your re-scripting life includes adjusting expectations and definitions of hospitality versus entertaining.
- Do you have a signature dish? I love how Jen and Shauna (who inspired this topic- referral link) said,” just make a thing your thing and make the same delicious thing a hundred times in a row.. you just don’t have to fix it if it’s not broken.” It might be spaghetti and meatballs, pasta or taco salad, or pizza – serve it stuffed full of love! Jen and Shauna have their thing: ChickenMangoCurry_SalmonMustardPecans
- Paper plates and plastic cutlery can make the difference of inviting that family with young children or not. (I am working on a mindset for all kinds of scenarios.) Set a table with conversation to celebrate the joy of friendship, laughter, and inclusion.
- Plan and host (share) your meal at an appropriate location other than your home. Simple food can be the catalyst to connect with new immigrants, seniors, singles. (Just a note: so often the receiving is much greater than the effort of the giving!)
Meeting the hunger need may not be easy for us. The food options and choices may or may not fit with our nutrition philosophy; I’m not advocating we toss out what we know to support our long-term wellness.
I am just suggesting we thoughtfully consider the question what and how we can help provide what people are hungry for. (How to help nurture those less obvious spiritual and emotional hungers are saved for Part Two in another post.)
Thanks for stopping by – and I’d love to know what is your food thing? Send along the recipe and I’ll add it to a list with Jen and Shauna’s.
With love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about rejuvenating your life with healthy food, getting more active, moving towards purposeful living at any age, I’m available here or at ketoews@gmail.com.
Tips for Re-Scripting summer with its changes in stages of life
I adore – love – wholeheartedly embrace summer! The extended daylight, more time dedicated to family, fresh(er) food, focus on activity: it is all SO energizing.
And just as life has different stages, our summer seasons vary from one to another.
My summers as a Mom with two kids at home were typically: a two-week vacation, often camping; tending flower beds and vegetable gardens; planning and hosting family celebrations; squeezing flexibility into work schedules of both my husband and myself.
In the years following, our two kids had summer weddings and eventually the family expanded with an accumulative total of six fantastic grandkids! After our move to Nova Scotia in 2007, summers had a different vibe with sharing fun and sun and sand with family; my husband and I exploring our new province every opportunity we had.
As our family members have grown older, our summer story has changed based on hosting visitors; excursions kayaking with friends in Kejimkujik National Park , cycling in Quebec , back-pack hiking. Less garden planting and tending: always berry picking.
This summer of 2018 is significantly raising the bar for a different story.
My husband is on a cross-the-country (Canada) motorbike trip. His dream for taking this epic journey is happening while I write.
To travel the distance, with flexibility to ‘go with the flow’, he is away for five weeks, six weeks, or maybe two months. He’s calling it a “trip to revisit his past” as he catches up with family and friends and places in Quebec; Ontario; Minnesota, USA; the Canadian prairies; British Columbia; and locations in between. An ambitious and adventure-packed journey.
June 1st launching from home for trip-of-a-lifetime!
I couldn’t be happier for him. His updates and photos reflect the realization of his wishes.
Of course I miss him – we miss each other – but this isn’t the first time we’ve been apart for this length of time. You can read the story in my Journey of the Heart – the beginning of my re-scripting for this stage of life and one that continues to be re-written.
This trip was planned a few months in advance; my husband ordered specific protective gear and serviced his bike (high priority for both him and me!); stocked up on maps and planned a basic route; communicated with people he wanted to see.
Changes in life often happen without warning; we re-script as it plays out. This time I had a heads up, so I prepared for what I would do while he was away, based on outdoor activities l enjoy, and a mindset to include challenge and celebration into my summer!
Making intentional plans was important for me. If your summer view looks like there are some changes – or you want to make some changes, I encourage you to consider:
- A basic plan still allows for spontaneity: without it days can roll along after each other. Avoid regret of missed opportunity for adventure, exploration or personal growth: whether it’s a solo trip: by plane or train to visit grandkids, or a hiking trip.
- Contact a like-minded friend or women in your community, commit to a date to connect with someone. I lean towards people who also enjoy physical activity; perhaps you’re curious to visit a new museum, make a road trip to a charming B&B you’ve seen advertised, do a bookstore run, visit as many beaches as you can.
- Intercept fear of ‘I’ve never done that before!‘- register for the art class if it’s a recurring desire. I’m working through this myself: an ocean kayak trip is planned – in the company of competent paddlers – but upping the ante for me!
- Choose not to miss the joy in your plans; don’t compare your life with what others are doing, or adjust your plans according to “what others will think about you!”
- Adjust other areas of your life to accommodate the plan. If you miss some of the berry season and can’t fill the freezer like usual – oh well!
- Adopt the mindset that plans often change; sometimes they even work out better!
View of Montreal from summit of Mont Royal – just before the rain!
My re-scripted summer plans are shaping up and already being enjoyed: kayaking and hiking new routes; rendezvousing with my sister in Montreal to celebrate my 65th birthday – along with my daughter and family who live there. So grateful for it all.
Your summer is your unique story. I hope you’re inspired to ‘write’ a great one for YOU!
Love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about rejuvenating your life with healthy food, getting more active, moving towards purposeful living at any age, I’m available here or at ketoews@gmail.com.
Kindness
The kindness theme has been following me around for a few days.
Finally, after a cheery little girl (about 4 or 5 years old) heaved open a heavy glass door for me to enter a store, I knew I needed to write about this gift of kindness!
The very word kindness evokes a sense of warmth and goodness – just give yourself a hug to reinforce how wonderful kindness can make you feel! Please stay with me ’til the end of the post – for spreading kindness full circle back to YOU – with my Downloadable Freebie
Let’s Just Be a Little Kinder in the Ways We Can
Katrina Kenison, author of several books (referral link), has written through her seasons of re-scripting life and shared this in her Kindness blog .
“….we cannot make pain and suffering disappear. We can’t control the hurtful actions of others or silence the voices that threaten, humiliate, insult, or shame. We cannot solve the opioid crisis, keep the desperate family together at the border, slow the arctic melt, or prevent the disturbed teenager from killing his classmates. We can bring more kindness into the world…”
What Can you Give From Your Hand or Your Pocket?
I just love Ann Voskamp’s writing style, here are some of her wise, kind words from The Broken Way,(referral link):
“… If your hand was willing, you could pull out [of your pocket] a small miracle, a small gift – a note that made a soul stronger, a cup of something warm to soothe someone’s knotted places, a hand to help someone up, open arms just to embrace the overwhelmed and whisper grace“.
Voskamp (a sage, in my view) skillfully expands this giving kindness thought: including a research reference, how kindness, “having a helping behaviour seemed to buffer the negative effects of stress.” Isn’t that great how that works? A kindness partnership: stretching from our heart, or our pocket – or pushing hard to open a door.
(credits to Bella Vita)
Use YOUR Kindness Voice
What does your kindness, love language look like?
- preparing a meal for the family of someone who’s mid-stream in cancer treatments
- watering the vacationing neighbour’s flowers that look ready to crawl to the tap
- phoning – or driving – to talk to a friend or family member you’ve lost touch with
- sharing cards and notes with inspirational messages….
It’s great when we feel we’ve discerned a meaningful way to show kindness, but here too, doing life is not about being perfect, that you have to get it right or not at all. Give from the gift of who you are.
If you’re interested in discovering your love language (and for others in the household too!) check out Gary Chapman’s helpful book (referral link).
Full Circle Back to You
What are the ways you show yourself kindness? Have you hugged yourself yet today? Do it now!
The message about the value of caring for ourself physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually is everywhere.
I also know that too often energy or spirit is lagging and I’m not anxious to offer my husband a back rub, or talk on the phone with a friend who’s had a rough day, or give myself slack for having too much sunlight in the room while shooting my LIVE video!
I believe the starting point is: what are we thinking, as our thoughts direct our days. To help you establish a practice for a mindset and ‘kindness lifestyle’ that you can grow with, I am excited to gift you with my free Renewing your Mindset for Vibrant Living
If this Kindness message has inspired you, or if you have a kindness story (given or received) to share, I’d love to hear from you!
Love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about rejuvenating your life with healthy food, getting more active, moving towards purposeful living at any age, I’m available at ketoews@gmail.com or here.
(Affiliate Disclosure: I am a participate in affiliate marketing, including the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Whenever you buy something on Amazon from a link you click on my blog, I get a (very) small percentage of that sale.)
Mindset – a Powerful Agent: reviewed through reading Hope Heals and Etched in Sand
Mindset: the established set of attitudes held by someone; a mental inclination, frame of mind; a way of thinking…..
The book I’m reading has been waiting on a shelf a long time! I finally got into Mindset – The New Psychology of Success (author Carol Dweck -referral link) after a friend shared these focal premises:
- a fixed mindset is “believing your qualities are carved in stone”; one that can keep you trapped and threatened by the success of others.
- a growth mindset is “believing your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts”; one that can bring you a richer, more alive and inspired life.
For me, this book has not been a page-turner. I find the content dense and the chapters written in a cumbersome format. However, I am munching my way through, intent to learn how to develop a growth mindset. The following notes are practical tips for any age and stage, (and I quote):
- intelligence can be developed
- with a desire to learn rather than look smart, work for achievement by:
- embracing challenge
- persisting in the face of setbacks
- viewing effort as the way to improvement
- learning from criticism
- finding tips and inspiration from other’s successes
As I said, pretty “heady” reading so to balance it out I’ve read two memoirs that had me hooked. The powerful agent of mindset for amazing resilience and determination over extreme odds in both of them was my inspiration for this post.
First was Hope Heals (written by Katherine Wolf and Jay Wolf, referral link), recommended by my daughter, Renee Tougas. I gobbled this book up. In the final two paragraphs of her blogpost Renee shares how the essence of Hope Heals impacted her (which I think many of us can relate to) – beginning with a brief synopsis:
“.. a story of a young mother’s life-threatening massive brain stem stroke, her subsequent disabilities and physical recoveries…a story of loss and hope, suffering and faith.”
“How would I handle such a difficult circumstance?” can’t help but be a question from the reader, and in this story’s excruciating conditions – a physical sense being only one way – one could feel the pain as the pendulum swung between the two mindsets.
The young mother, 26-year-old Katherine, did (does) have a strong faith foundation along with a loving and supportive family. But to dig deep into the place where ‘rules of the game’ suddenly were reversed (a daily energetic run switched out for a stroke and a wheelchair-walker combo!); a growth mindset and determination played a huge role in her outstanding recovery, as well as their family staying intact – with ultimately having another child!
The second one: Etched in Sand: A True Story of Five Siblings Who Survived an Unspeakable Childhood on Long Island (author Regina Calcaterra,referral link). This was almost unbelievable reading from my framework of growing up secure and loved.
The set of players: five siblings, biological and foster parents, social workers and teachers and other authority figures. It’s amazing these siblings survived – a story of shifting circumstances and mindsets. Regina – one of the five and author of the book – was particularly ‘chosen’ for abuse but so driven by a mental will, commitment and love to struggle and endure to keep the family together at almost any cost.
The outcomes of these stories invoked victory and hope and respect: won through pain and sacrifices (that are on-going), that God-willing I hope will not be my personal journey to walk. And hopefully neither for you.
But for certain, our lives will be daily altered and affected by our mindset. I encourage you to commit to grow in the one that will be your path to your endless potential.
Love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about challenges and joys with mindset, healthy lifestyle, moving towards purposeful living at any age, please email me at ketoews@gmail.com or contact me here.
Thank you for prairie landscape photo: sister, Ruth Langerud.
(privacy policy and affiliate disclosure: I am a participate in affiliate marketing, including the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Whenever you buy something on Amazon from a link you click on my blog, I get a (very) small percentage of that sale.)
Trail Food for Lightweight Hiking and Heavyweight Nutrition
Tomorrow I am joining other sole mates at the Hike Nova Scotia Summit. There will be presentations on new hikes to discover, the latest gear, hiking stories and tales. FUN!!!
AND there will be recipes exchanged for food to eat on the trail: I’m keen on that, especially fuel that is high-energy, nutrient-dense and light-weight!
Granola bars and peanut butter sandwiches are great hiking fare but if multiple days of this menu is not your idea of trail food then check out the Back-Pack Camping link for recipes: instant breakfast cereal and hearty rockin’ root soup! More energy and less costly than the packages you buy – and delicious! Check in from time to time on my Real Food for Vibrant Living where I will post new recipe tips to help you carry less food-weight to encourage more time on the trail. For now, here’s a couple recipes to have ready in the freezer for whatever the activity or even breakfast on the run: EnergyBars_ReplacementMeal and if you like biscotti you will love Power Biscotti Bars.
Note: substitute whatever nuts and seeds you prefer in your instant cereal.
For dessert or an anytime snack on the trail, have you tried dehydrated fruit? It is like heaven! Strawberries are especially wonderful. Slice them up, refer to fruit temperature setting and dehydrate (this is a referral link for the dehydrator I use and love!) for several hours until dried. (Dried fruit can also be dried in an oven set on low temperature.)
TIP: if you have a dehydrator, aren’t crazy about hiking yourself but know friends who do, you will score HUGE love- points by sharing these nuggets of sweet vitamin C with them.
I’d love to hear what are the foods you take on a hike – whether it’s for a day or a week. Please share your favourites, and recipes would be awesome.
Do you have an outdoor walk or a hike on your radar soon? There’s just something about having healthy snacks along that helps us enjoy the trip.
Love and gratitude,
Karen
P.S. As always, if you want to talk about rejuvenating your life with healthy food, getting more active, moving towards purposeful living at any age, I’m available at ketoews@gmail.com or here.
(Affiliate Disclosure: I am a participate in affiliate marketing, including the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Whenever you buy something on Amazon from a link you click on my blog, I get a (very) small percentage of that sale.)
Karen Toews 